Alot

Been alot going on since my last post. I have been lazy not posting really.

We both went to the FS the other week. He was a bit confused why we were there when I'm supposed to have a 2 month old. We told him the story and he was kind of appauled that it happened and the ending of it all. "Its not the way I would have done things" was his words. He sent me for some bloods that the hospital already did while I was there and some bloods to see if I was ovulating. And to see him in 2 weeks.

Two weeks passed and again I found him back in his office with my trusty notepad full of questions. At first he goes well you ovulated! And I was like what?!? I looked at the level and I thought hmm thats strange it seems so similar to the level last year. So I went on and he answered all the questions I had. We have a less than 5% chance of an abruption happening again. I told him as an ob he was too expensive and that I cant afford him. He sold himself pretty well to me and said when the time comes call him and he will look after me. Yay for a discount. He is such a good doctor, yes he may be arrogant but hey arent they all? Just before I was going to leave I said bah, are you sure I ovulated? So he got out the results again and looked and went oh look no you didnt. He got the years wrong. Phew. I got a script for clomid, one for provera (to bring on my period) and a path slip for CD23 BT to see if I have ovulated. So I think the appointment went really well.

That was the Thursday, the next day I had an ultrasound at Monash because the doctor that delivered Hayley recons that I might have PCOS. Whatever I thought, a free look at my bits why not. MAN I didnt realise how emotional I would be walking back into that hospital alone. I have been back a couple of times, but both times Ive either had Ingri or Craig with me so going alone was really hard. I got into the waiting room and there was like a 16 year old girl pregnant sitting opposite me. I thought are you fucking serious. Here she is, just out of a womb herself and having a baby that she nor her partner will be able to provide for and my baby's ashes are in our cupboard. It was fucked. So I had the ultrasound, I may or may not have cried to the doctors in there then he goes Ohhh I know about you. Ive seen the trace, wow that was a weird one, Im so sorry. Oh and your ultrasound looks like you may have PCOS but the BT's will help. GREAT, my body fucking hates me I thought.

Yesterday was my first day back at work. I had tears going out the front door. People at work were pretty good. I was doing the meds and the bank girl came up to me and was like Oooh Koby have you had the baby yet?!? I was like yep. She's like awww what did you have?! Im like a girl. Shes like Aw so sweet a baby girl, Im like mmmm.. and she walked away. I tried to find her because I just had to tell her. Then I was walking around and the porter cam up to me and goess I havent seen you in ages, hows the baby going? That broke me down, I just burst into tears. I felt sorry for the poor guy, he didnt know, the bank girl didnt know. After I had a cry and some cuddles I was alright. The bank girl said she knew she had said something wrong from the look on my face. Oh well, the rest of the day went okay except for the greek lady falling. All good.

I also forgot to kinda mentioned that we are engaged :)

Its beautiful :) I chose it myself :)

So this weekend Im going to Adelaide. Driving over with a few people from the cheer squad and flying back on Saturday night. Hopefully it will all go alright.

Toodles for now.